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Should I Stay or Should I Go? pt 1

By
Real Estate Agent with 774.289.5521

This is the question too many people are asking themselves these days. For whatever reason you've gotten behind in your mortgage – you've lost your job and haven't been able to find another; a spouse is out of work; the cost of living has just gotten too high in your area.

Maybe you're not behind yet. Maybe your income is about to drop and you know that you won't be able to afford your current mortgage. Maybe you've heard stories about people "walking away" and renting is starting to look like a good idea right now.

Whatever the reason, losing your home can make you feel like a failure. It can make you feel like you let your family down.

The first thing for you to know is that you aren't alone. There are many families just like yours that are in the same boat.

Owning a Home is was the American Dream

Here are some staggering foreclosure statistics

• 1 out of every 200 homes will be foreclosed upon.

• Every three months, 250,000 new families enter into foreclosure.

• One child in every classroom in America is at risk of losing his/her home because their parents are unable to pay their mortgage.

Step 1: Remove Emotion

When you are stuck in emotion, you are stuck in the past. Yes, your kids did grow up in that house. Yes, you did learn how to put those cabinets in yourself. Yes, you did give the bank thousands upon thousands of dollars to live there. (You would have given those thousands of dollars to a landlord if you hadn't given them to the bank. Nobody lives for free.)

While those are wonderful memories, they are the past. To make a good decision, you have to remove the emotional attachment to your home by thinking about the future. If you stay, what will your life be like next year? I can almost guarantee that it won't be the same life it was in your memories. If you leave, what will change? Leaving may not solve all your problems either because many of the struggles you are going through today will follow you wherever you live.

So what do you do?

Make a Decision

When you purchased your home that was the best decision for your family at that time. Things have changed. You need to be proactive to make the best decision for your family RIGHT NOW.

Whether you stay in your home or decide to leave, it is a decision that you should be making. If you leave it up to your bank to decide, that’s still a decision. But it’s a decision that will leave you feeling like a victim. You may be a victim of your current circumstances (you didn’t ask for the layoff, etc), but you don’t have to live like a victim.

(Read part 2 here)

Bisendra Melaram
Brita Realty Corp. 718-909-0233 - South Ozone Park, NY
Realtor

Great post Crystal!

We are all somewhat emotionally attached to what we refer to as "personal" items. Homes, cars, boats, motorcycles and the such.  Which makes it all that much more difficult to make hard decisions regarding those items.

It is easy for outsiders looking in to judge, I often put myself in the shoes of the one on the inside looking out.  Doesn't make it any easier when you have to explain the available options to a distressed family.

Crystal your post was straight to the point, "live for today as tomorrow is not guaranteed"!

Apr 11, 2011 03:32 PM
Sophia Lin
Intero Real Estate Services - Sunnyvale, CA
Sunnyvale CA Real Estate Specialist

Great topic to talk about and an even better explaination.....wish it wasn't a fact though!

Apr 11, 2011 03:42 PM
Rob D. Shepherd
RETIRED - Florence, OR
RETIRED

I can't believe the amount of people I personally know that have been faced with this.

Apr 11, 2011 03:59 PM
Joshua Harley
Fathom Realty - Plano, TX
CEO, Tech Geek, Innovator, Disruptor, US Marine

It's a HOME when you move in, but when you move out, it's a business decision.  It's a House.

Apr 12, 2011 05:15 AM
Crystal Pina
774.289.5521 - Worcester, MA
Remax Professional Associates

Bisendra - it's easy to judge when we aren't in someone else's shoes. I know people in this situation and they don't want to make a decision because all the choices are bad.

I know, Sophia.Thanks for the comment.

Rob, that's why I wrote this. Too many of my friends are facing this decision.

Joshua, for most people that's true. But for people who are being forced to go, they have to emotionally detach. That's the hard part.

Apr 12, 2011 02:51 PM
Edward moloney
Edward Moloney Loan Officer GMH Mortgage Services - Holliston, MA
Loan Officer Providing 5 STAR SERVICE

A great post and real world issues. I sit on the board of Big Brother Big sister that covers your area. It is very very tough these days for so so many people. I like your straight forward approach. Fact is it also has an impact on those that are renting since many landloards are loosing those properties as well

Apr 12, 2011 03:49 PM