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My Immortal

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner with ADT Real Estate

For those who know me at least a little bit, you might guess that this post is inspired something altogether different than it is. I guess all inspiration comes from the same place, so don't get too concerned over this brief glimpse into the melancholy side of my conscience.

I had breakfast with a friend yesterday and our conversation really got to me. He's a newlywed. That's supposed to be the time when you're still infatuated with your spouse. Our conversation should have been about the joyful times he was having with his new bride. Instead, our conversation was a heavy and draining conversation about betrayal, anger, disappointment and divorce. My heart broke for my friend yesterday. I remember those days and how it felt for me when I walked those same dark halls. I walked those halls alone for quite a while and, if it hadn't been for a good friend who came alongside me and helped carry my burden, I don't know where I would have ended up. I won't let that happen now.

Nothing else seems to matter much when your heart is broken. Sleep doesn't come and you soon find yourself in a numb haze that goes on forever. You feel like this song, which speaks so strongly and effectively (as only Evanesence can) about the pain that love brings us when things go wrong. I think that mourning our losses in life is very important to our abilities to grow and move on. I'm mourning my friend's all to premature loss of innocence in his marriage. How often does this happen in America these days? We are a nation of disposable everything, even marriages.

I could easily relate this to the real estate market and our national problem with foreclosures, but I think that correlation is all too apparant. The most important thing right now is my friend and his wife. They're both very angry right now. They're both disappointed and feeling such a loss of hope. They are experiencing a great deal of pain and want it to be over with right now. Divorce isn't the answer to that problem and I made sure he understood that. A divorce doesn't break the bond between two people who have committed themselves to one another. It just provides a legal validation of the decision that they have made to go separate ways physically. Spiritually, those two people still have a connection that will last for all of their lives, whether they like it or not.

I'm praying that they work on their physical relationship, with all of the emotions that are involved with that, and that they let the spiritual connection they have hold them together until they can get the rest figured out. They'll be much happier in the end.

Until next time...

Jason Sardi
Auto & Home & Life Insurance throughout North Carolina - Charlotte, NC
Your Agent for Life
Andrew - Great song man and I think we all need to realize the underlying philosophy that comes out of one of my favorite movies of all-time, 'The Crow'.  It can't rain all the time....
Nov 10, 2007 03:04 AM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Jason,

True, very true.

Nov 10, 2007 03:24 AM
Jason Crouch
Austin Texas Homes, LLC - Austin, TX
Broker - Austin Texas Real Estate (512-796-7653)
Andrew - I think that this may be one of my favorite posts for the entire week.  It came from your heart, and there is nothing better to me.  I hope and pray that your friend and his wife can get things back on track.  The addition of the song really added an element to this post that fully fleshed out what you and he are feeling. 
Nov 10, 2007 08:06 AM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Jason,

Thanks for the comment. I didn't post this to any groups or attach it anywhere else, so I didn't expect to see comments but they're welcome.

I spoke to my friend earlier to check on him and he told me that they're talking now. That's the first step to getting over something like this. The lines of communication have to remain open. Now, I hope they take that conversation to someone who can help them sort things out.

Nov 10, 2007 08:25 AM
Maria Couto
RE/MAX Premier - Berkeley Heights, NJ
Realtor with "Results That "MOVE" You'

Hi Andrew, Just read your post, and your response to Jason. Your on the money. Anger and resentment build up if not discussed and validated one way or another, Marriage take patience, definite commitment, and most important: trust. After 10 years it felt our wedding was just yesterday, now after 23 years it feels more like last week. That's not bad. It taken a lot of work to keep it fresh. It's worth it.

Nov 10, 2007 02:03 PM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Maria,

I appreciate the words of wisdom. Thanks very much.

Nov 10, 2007 04:33 PM
Dianne Barody
Century 21 AmeriSouth Realty - Pensacola, FL
Pensacola Florida Real Estate
Andrew:  Gosh you wrote how I feel.  I don't want to give up on my marriage either, but my husband seems to want to.  I believe in much better days to come if only........................
Nov 12, 2007 03:13 AM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Dianne,

I'm sorry to hear about this. You're in my prayers.

Nov 12, 2007 06:15 AM
Dianne Barody
Century 21 AmeriSouth Realty - Pensacola, FL
Pensacola Florida Real Estate
Andrew:  Thanks for putting me on your prayer list.  Hey, I am ok.  Good will come of this cause I believe. As of today....my husband has been nice to me.  Who knows what the future holds.  I say keep praying.
Nov 13, 2007 06:33 AM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Dianne,

No problem. I'm hoping it'll all come out well in the end.

Nov 13, 2007 09:21 AM
Diane Velikis
Coldwell & Banker Busch Real Estate - Luzerne, PA
Luzerne County Real Estate
Andrew, Wow, seems we both have people we love in need of prayer for their broken marriages! I cried listening to your perfectly selected song. I pray all goes well for your friends
Nov 15, 2007 12:36 PM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Diane,

Divorce brings nothing but pain, destruction and ruin. I hate it!! It hurts me so much to see others going through this pain. I'm listening to this song and the lyrics so perfectly speak of the pain that separation from something we hold so dear to us brings to our lives. Pray, Diane, because only God can help this wounded state we're in these days.

Nov 15, 2007 02:00 PM