Ah, motivation... My youngest daughter is a picky eater. Actually, saying she's picky is a severe understatement. If left to her own devices, her diet would consist solely of chicken nuggets, pizza and candy. Dinners are often an ordeal in our family. Everyone will have finished while my sad-eyed 4th-grader pushes vegetables around her plate, her meal only partially nibbled.
She's too old for positive reinforcement. She's not a toddler for whom it would be appropriate for me to smile and say, "Good job!" every time she took a bite. Threats of (nor actual) punishment do not have an impact on her. The authors of Parenting with Love and Logic have asserted that you cannot make another person eat or sleep, and I believe they are correct.
It's not like our dinners consist of liver & onions, creamed fish or dubious leftovers (If you actually like the foregoing, I'm not sure what to say), so that shouldn't be an excuse- Our older daughter eats just fine without adverse effects. No, it is a question of "will." As the Love and Logic book points out, my 10-year-old cannot be forced to eat, so eating is something she can control. Ultimately, it's got to be up to her. As a parent, that's tough to swallow (pun intended).
In the workplace, positive and negative reinforcement do apply to our motivation. On the positive side we can increase our income, receive recognition, achieve greater authority and/or autonomy, etc. On the negative side we can go broke, be demoted or even lose our jobs altogether. But how well we do our jobs and the way in which we do them (e.g. efficiently, with a good attitude) is really completely within our control. If we only put forth effort based on rewards/threats, I don't think our effort would hold up over time. Certainly the proverbial "carrot and stick" matter- Most of us appreciate being acknowledged for good work- but there has to be a sense of drive, pride and/or commitment within us. Those traits act as the field where positive motivations can take root and grow.
So, for an employer (such as Stewart Title), it's important to have rules and both positive and negative recognition procedures in place- just like I have at my dining room table. But it's also important for all of us, both employers and employees, to recognize that ultimately people cannot be controlled. Ultimately they will succeed or fail because that is their choice. That's a good thing, though, because it means success is truly within our power- We just have to choose it as our path. I hope my younger daughter chooses to be successful. For now, though, I'll be content if she'll just eat broccoli without crying.
Comments(5)