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Redneck Driver's Application...LOL

By
Real Estate Agent 0574070

 Redneck stop signRedneck Stop Sign

 

REDNECK DRIVER'S LICENSE APPLICATION - (I thought this was hilarious! It hit a bit close to home!)


Last name: ________________
(Check appropriate box)
First name: First name:

[_] Billy-Bob [_] Bobby-Sue
[_] Billy-Joe [_] Bobby-Jo
[_] Billy-Ray [_] Bobby-Ann
[_] Billy-Sue [_] Bobby-Lee
[_] Billy-Mae [_] Bobby-Ellen
[_] Billy-Jack [_] Bobby-Beth Ann Sue

Age: ____ (if unsure, guess)
Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ Not sure
Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right
Occupation:
[_] Farmer [_] Mechanic
[_] Hair Dresser [_] Waitress
[_] Un-employed [_] Dirty Politician

Spouse's Name: __________________________
2nd Spouse's Name: __________________________
3rd Spouse's Name: __________________________
Lover's Name: __________________________
2nd Lover's Name: __________________________

Relationship with spouse:
[_] Sister [_] Aunt
[_] Brother [_] Uncle
[_] Mother [_] Son
[_] Father [_] Daughter
[_] Cousin [_] Pet

Number of children living in household: ___
Number of children living in shed: ___
Number of children that are yours: ___

Mother's Name: _______________________
Father's Name: _______________________(If not sure, leave blank)

Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)

Do you [_] own or [_] rent your mobile home? (Check appropriate box)

Vehicles you own and where you keep them:
___ Total number of vehicles you own
___ Number of vehicles that still crank
___ Number of vehicles in front yard
___ Number of vehicles in back yard
___ Number of vehicles on cement blocks

Firearms you own and where you keep them:
____ truck ____ kitchen
____ bedroom ____ bathroom
____ shed

Model and year of your pickup: _____________ 194_

Do you have a gun rack?
[_] Yes [_] No; If no, please explain:

Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:
[_] The National Enquirer [_] The Globe
[_] TV Guide [_] Soap Opera Digest
[_] Rifle and Shotgun

___ Number of times you've seen a UFO
___ Number of times you've seen Elvis
___ Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO

How often do you bathe:
[_] Weekly
[_] Monthly
[_] Not Applicable

How many teeth? ___
Color of teeth:
[_] Yellow [_] Brownish-Yellow
[_] Brown [_] Black
[_] N/A

Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:
[_] Red-Man

How far is your home from a paved road?
[_] 1 mile
[_] 2 miles
[_] don't know

 

Posted by

Jennifer A. Martin, REALTOR® 

Bancroft Realty, LLC 

Direct: (469)-450-2129

Jenniferamartin777@gmail.com

 

Comments(35)

Laura Moore Godek
Laura Moore Godek, PC - McHenry, IL

I really enjoyed your joke.

May 19, 2008 05:40 PM
Roland Woodworth
Blue Cord Realty - Clarksville, TN
Blue Cord Realty

Oh my Jennifer... Gotta love this one.... just currious.... Did you pass ?

May 19, 2008 06:57 PM
Jennifer A. Martin
Dallas, TX
Executive Assistant

William and Laura - Thanks for commenting!!

Roland - Uh, yeah, I did!!

May 20, 2008 09:23 AM
Dick Betts
TOUCHSTONE REAL ESTATE - The Villages, FL
REALTOR® The Villages, Florida

Thanks for the light moments!  I have family that could fill that out and pass!

May 20, 2008 01:14 PM
Jennifer A. Martin
Dallas, TX
Executive Assistant

Dick - LOL!  My family could as well!!

May 21, 2008 09:10 AM
Trey Thurmond
BCR Realtors - College Station, TX
College Station , Texas Homes

I think I did this application once myself. :-)

 

May 23, 2008 04:32 PM
Jennifer A. Martin
Dallas, TX
Executive Assistant

Trey - That's funny!  I know I have!  My son's name is Trey.  You must be a third?

May 24, 2008 03:34 AM
Patty Ledford
RE/MAX Town and Country - Blue Ridge, GA
Your N. Ga. Mountain Agent -The Ledford Team-Blue

Jennifer that is way too funny, thanks for sharing some Redneck humor!

May 25, 2008 02:26 PM
Jennifer A. Martin
Dallas, TX
Executive Assistant

Hi Patty - I'm glad you enjoyed it!  Thanks for commenting!!

May 25, 2008 03:03 PM
Chuck Roberts
Prudential Shimmering Sands Realty - Panama City, FL

Good stuff. I'm originally from the Chicago area, but moved to Florida 14 years ago. I pretty much get along with everyone, but I got tired of hearing all the stuff about being a Yankee, when I moved here. I was ready to get a bumper sicker, with a rebel flag on it, with an extra X through it and the phrase "You Lost. Get Over It". Of coures I probably would have had to buy stock in a tire company. haha

May 26, 2008 03:15 PM
Kevin Corsa
H.I.S. Home Inspections (Summit, Stark Counties) - Canton, OH
H.I.S. Home Inspections, Stark & Summit County, OH Home Inspector

Sounds like some of the people who might live in that muti-family mansion I posted on my blog. Very funny indeed.

May 26, 2008 10:32 PM
Jennifer A. Martin
Dallas, TX
Executive Assistant

Chuck  - My hubby WAS a yankee too, now he is basically a good ole country boy (took lots of work!).  The accent only comes out when he says CHICAAAGO! Oh well, I won't take that away from him.

Kevin - OH MY!!!!  The picture of the "mansion" is priceless!! 

May 27, 2008 08:56 AM
Kevin McGourty
Realty ONE Group - Phoenix, AZ

Man, you got some pretty good hits on this blog. I need you to promote my company. Heck, just throw the name out there -- people will flock to it.  :)  - Kevin

May 27, 2008 10:04 AM
Jennifer A. Martin
Dallas, TX
Executive Assistant

Kevin - What can I say, people just love to get in touch wtih their inner redneck!!! 

May 28, 2008 12:22 AM
Dale Baker
Baker Energy Audits and Commercial Properties Inspections - Claremont, NH
New Hampshire Relocation Real Estate Information

Howdy Jennifer

New this here post, is a real hoot for sure.

Redneck Tow Truck

 

Heres a Redneck Tow Truck for your post.

 

 

 

 

God Bless The U.S.A.

May 30, 2008 01:34 PM
Jennifer A. Martin
Dallas, TX
Executive Assistant

Dale - I love it!!  Thanks!

Jun 01, 2008 07:20 AM
David Bennett
Tarbell, Realtors - Yorba Linda, CA
Yorba Linda Real Estate

Great way to start my day with a big ole smile!!!

Jun 05, 2008 03:25 AM
Jennifer A. Martin
Dallas, TX
Executive Assistant

David - Glad you enjoyed it!

Jun 06, 2008 10:43 AM
Dale Baker
Baker Energy Audits and Commercial Properties Inspections - Claremont, NH
New Hampshire Relocation Real Estate Information

Howdy Jennifer

Glad ya liked it, your are welcome. Sorry I had not goten back before now.

God Bless The U.S.A.

Jun 08, 2008 01:55 PM
Jennifer A. Martin
Dallas, TX
Executive Assistant

No problem Dale!  We all get busy!

Jun 08, 2008 02:30 PM