Mixing Business with Pleasure... Does it mix?

Have you ever felt obligated to use a family member when it came to a business deal? While most of us have, has it ever left you wondering if that was the best decision? In some cases, it is an ideal circumstance. While in others it may be an uncomfortable situation that you were strong armed into. When it comes to Real Estate, for most people purchasing a home will be the biggest purchase in their lives. Which begs the question… do you want to hire a Realtor out of obligation or acquire one that has the skill set to provide unbiased information to assure you make the right choice when it comes time to purchase? I guess this circumstance definitely falls under the double edge sword category. Some would argue that family is always the best policy because there is already a built in “trust” clause. While others may argue that using family is a bad idea and only causes tension if something goes wrong. Let’s look at both the positive and negative aspects of hiring a family member as your Realtor…. Let’s pretend for a second that you are a first time home buyer and are ready to dive in and buy your first home. You have a family member who is in the business and expects you to use him/her. However, your not comfortable with them and aren’t sure he/she is the best fit. Meanwhile other family members are pressuring you to use them. Being a first time home buyer you have no idea how the process works or what loan products would be most beneficial to you. You look to your Realtor for guidance and to educate you on what loan products are available to a first time home buyer with little down payment, however your family member shrugs you off and leaves you playing the guessing game. When it comes time to get pre-approved your family member refers you to their lender and does not tell you to shop around for the best rate or explain what loan products you should be discussing with the lender. He/she automatically assumes because you’re family they can tell you what to do and you will do it no questions asked. To add icing to the cake, he/she refuses to show you short sale listings because they take too long, even though in your price range short sale listings make up about 1/3 of the inventory, which equates to you missing out on a huge chunk of homes that may fit your criteria. With this attitude, how are you supposed to feel comfortable with the home buying process? If you’re not comfortable enough to express your concerns, why on Earth would you continue the business relationship? At this point, the tension has built and it is only a matter of time until someone explodes and the family relationship is scarred. We sometimes have the tendency to let things slide when it comes to family. However when it comes to the biggest purchase of your life, do you really want to “let things slide”? On a positive note.. You are a first time home buyer, who has a family member in the business. You have a great relationship with him/her already and feel completely comfortable hiring them as your Realtor. Your family member is very hands on and explains the home buying process in detail, while setting you up with a few lenders to ensure you get the best interest rate and loan product available to you. Because you are a first time home buyer and have little down payment your family member knows he/she will have to show you all available active homes, whether they be regular sales, short sales or foreclosures. You feel more confident as the process moves forward and know you made the right decision when hiring your family member. So the question still remains… Is it better to mix business with pleasure or keep them separate? The answer won’t be the same for everyone. I guess at the end of the day, you have to listen to your gut. If you feel comfortable going into the situation, 9 times out of 10 things will pan out. If you are uneasy going in, maybe you should stop and weigh out the pros and cons before making your decision. If you don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings, talk to them about your concerns. If he/she is a professional, they will gladly refer you to another Realtor who may better fit your needs.