How to see singleness as a blessing

Industry Observer with Justine Mfulama

As a 31-year old single Christian woman, it is very easy to get discouraged when it comes to marriage. After years of dating without any success, you start to wonder “Am I meant to be single?”. 


And yes, there will be some of us that are meant to be single. Some men and women God has truly called to serve him as a party of one.


So, if you ever asked yourself “What does the Bible say about being single?”, then here is your answer. 


Singleness is a gift from God

Being single allows you the opportunity to focus completely on God with fewer distractions. Being married and having kids, means that you have responsibilities, that will require your attention and time. While you may not agree with Paul that singleness is better than marriage, I believe it is very obvious how being single can still hold its benefits.


You are spared from a painful relationship

One thing I am truly thankful for in this season of my life is that I am protected from the headache and heartache of a painful/ complicated/ bad relationship. During my twenties, I have learned so much about myself, that I am not much more selective when it comes to who I allow into my life. Therefore, being single also means that I am currently spared from a relationship that does not serve me. 


You learn how to be content 

This point is probably the last point many of us want to hear. Because the fact is, that some of us are truly struggling in this season. If you are single but desire to be married, it may be hard to see how God can use this season as a gift. However, it truly can be. Just like a person that grew up poor may become a very wise spender once grown up, single people that had to wait for marriage longer than they desired may become wise wives and husbands. Not because you are better than your married counterparts, but because you have learned to be content in God, even when things did not turn out the way you want it to. 


Time to focus on other relationships

You get to spend quality time with your family members and friends and create deeper bonds with important people in your life. No matter if you are single or married, we all need quality relationships in our lives that balance us out. Singleness is a great season to focus on those relationships because you have the time to invest in them. 


Identify and focus on your passion/ purpose

Let’s be real. One of the major benefits of singleness is that you can be selfish. It’s a time in your life, where the only person you have to worry about is yourself. And the best way to benefit from that selfishness is to seek out your purpose. Truly devoting your time to understand what your unique gifts are and how God wants you to use them for his glory, is a great use of your single season. It gives you meaning and simultaneously makes you whole, which is a prerequisite for a healthy relationship later on. 

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