I Want to Find a "Friendly/Good Neighborhood" When I Buy a House

As a realtor in Chandler, Arizona the first thing I usually hear from homebuyers is that they want to buy a home in a "good neighborhood". When I inquire what that means to them the #1 answer tends to be schools, which I believe to be reflexive in nature, but deep down I know they are also looking for a neighborhood where the area is friendly, where you actually know who your neighbor is and don't cringe when you leave you home to go to work in the morning because you see each other so infrequently and feel bad about not being a better more approachable neighbor yourself.

Peter Lovenheim, an author who has written extensively about finding community in the United States gives us perspective on how to find what we are looking for.

Contrary to what people think there is actually no correlation to the income level of a neighborhood and its friendliness. And based on my experience there might even be a slightly negative correlation, meaning the better off the neighborhood the less friendly and approachable its people are, at least in Phoenix, AZ.

It is truly more difficult to buy in areas that are considered friendly and have closely-knit neighbors. One of the biggest reasons is that people are now busier than ever (wasn't technology supposed to give us MORE free time?), and most families have 2 income earners. Couple that with most adults being gone during the day and people spending more time on the internet and TV than ever, and you can see how this may be a daunting task. If that weren't enough Americans sense more "stranger danger" than in previous times,perhaps attributed to the media and all the ways they can now reach their viewers, whether times are actually worse or not.

While most people do want to live anonymously, having little contact from neighbors, most do indeed find life more pleasant in an environment where they know and get along with others. There is a fundamental human need to fit in where we dwell and share a common humanity.

Here are your pointers:

Visit the area several times a day and on weekends and weekdays

Look for patterns of activity. Observe whether people are interacting or staying inside their homes all the time.

Consider a new build community

Residents here can be very approachable. In general many who move to new areas are highly motivated to build lasting friendships with neighbors who also have kids. Everyone is looking to bond because they are all at the same starting point. There is no crowd or established relationships with which to break into.

Friendship is a 2-way street

It's give and take. You can borrow eggs, perhaps find someone to watch your home while you are away on vacation, and get help in an emergency. Keep in mind you have to give back. The best relationships are 2 sided, so thank that neighbor by having them over for dinner, or something they would consider nice.

Look for strong public schools

A strong public school system provides opportunities for its students. Not only that but it can draw people together, whether they have kids or not, which tightens the bonds of the residents. Mark Nash, real estate broker and author of "1001 Tips for Buying and Selling a Home" says "Strong schools are the epicenters of a strong community . Children of all ages bring people together"

What about age-restricted communities?

If you are 55+ you might be considering this option. In the east valley of Phoenix metro we have a few age-restricted communities in east Mesa, Sun Lakes/Chandler, and Ahwatukee. This age group looking into these options in with the hopes of finding the sort of social activities that will fill their retirement calendar. The ironic byproduct of some who go this route find quite the opposite: boredom.

In an area where everyone is the same age and the group is too homogeneous, often times residents have to go outside the community for stimulation.

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Author Matthew Coates, West USA Realty Revelation
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