A friend of mine will be attending a memorial service soon for a dear friend of his who passed away. Their friendship was one forged in the past ten years, which is a very late chapter in the life of his 90-something year old friend. The passage of this man is very sad for my friend, as he touched his life deeply.
Turns out, it was mutual. The elderly man’s daughter shared something with my friend that she discovered among her father’s things. In searching his address book to contact people for the memorial service, the entry for my friend had his name and address and phone number but beside his name it said, “A good friend.”
At what point would the man have written that? I’m guessing it was when the name was first entered in the book. That’s when you write all the details about a person, right? If you want to remember a reference, you might write the company they work for, or the service they provide. But for my friend, the most significant thing was... He’s a good friend.
Wow. I’d like that written of me as a first impression by people. It also strikes me that it was wonderful that his daughter shared that with him. How many times do we keep the compliments to ourselves, never sharing with someone else just how much they mean to us? I can tell you that it touched my friend’s heart. Deeply.
It reminded me of a friend of mine who passed away, a friend I’d never met in person, but who I’d grown quite close to, thanks to the internet. She lived worlds away in Australia but talks with her had helped me through some deeply challenging times. Her friendship meant the world to me. She died from cancer and as part of her request, friends from there in Oz and around the world who she knew via the internet, sent letters that were tucked in with her for “reading material for the journey onward.” When her daughter reached out to me to ask for a letter, she shared something with me. Beside my friend, Taryn’s computer, in addition to her list of email addresses and nicknames and locations of all of our group of friends was a picture of one of them. It was posted up high, with the person’s name written on it and a smile added behind the name. It was my picture. I was important to her, too, it turns out.
So here’s my challenge to me, perhaps to you, too. Tell the people who are important that they ARE important. If it’s a friend, a client, an associate, an affiliate... Take the time to tell them that they matter. It would be a great... and genuine reason... to reach out to a client with whom you haven't had contact in a while.
I can attest to the fact that it really does make a difference.
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