"Never, ever, ever remove that thing. It brings the protection of the Gods!" the inspector explained to the first-time-home buyer.
This is not the first time I'd heard that said about the exotic thing hanging on the front-door's jamb.
What the heck is that thing on the doorpost anyway? It's not even hung straight!
Well, it's a Mezzuzah, (Meh-Zu-Zah), and it's designed as a case with a special parchment (inscribed with a special prayer) designed to protect a Jewish household. Its angled on purpose... angled to point "inward" toward the area it's supposed to be protecting from - dun-dun-duuuunnn - the evil eye! It doesn't bring the protection of the Gods, as the inspector strongly advised. Since it's a Jewish religious symbol... it could only bring the protection of ONE God.
There's a section in the bible (Deuteronomy 6:6) that says "these words, which I command you this day, shall be on your heart. Thou shall teach them to your children, you shall talk of them when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.... You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.…
Yep, that's the part we're talkin' about. "Write them on the doorposts of your house." 
The mezzuzah is the action behind that phrase. And you find them on all sorts of homes. I was at a listing presentation recently, and the seller was a man named Sean O'Malley ... and there was that mezzuzah on the door. Throughout the house, there were other signs that indicated they were not a Jewish family so I went out on a limb and asked about it. They told me that it was on the door jamb when they bought the house, and they knew (they KNEW) that it was unlucky to remove it.
Ladies and gentlemen... it is not unlucky to remove a mezzuzah. If you're not Jewish and you don't want it there... it's typically just held in place with two small nails. Just pull it off. It's not uncommon for Jewish families to leave them behind, and purchase new ones for their new home. So if you want to take it down, you won't be bringing the wrath of demons down on your head.
You may, however, need to spackle and paint those two dinky holes that are left behind. Gasp!
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