A friend posted on Facebook the other day that her precious little boy asked her how he got inside her tummy before he was born. The responses from friends seemed to reflect either their own similar situation they’d faced with kids or their curiosity about how the question was answered (and received). She told him that Mommy and Daddy put him in there and then she changed the subject.
It took me back a few years to when my daughter was in kindergarten. Arriving home one day, she told me surreptitiously, “Mom, a bad word was written on the sidewalk today.”
With fear of that unknown word, and assuming it to be some variation of four letters, I hesitated but looked at her.
“S—E—X” she spelled out.
HUGE sigh of relief from me. “Oh, THAT word.”
And then, thankfully, something stopped me from saying anything more.
“Yes, Mommy, THAT word!” She seemed relieved, too, only I KNOW not for the same reason.
The message was delivered. Nothing more need be said, so she moved on to setting down her backpack and getting out homework.
I knew the day would follow that one, all too soon, where she’d want more details about that word, but for that day, all she needed was the knowledge that I was aware.
How often do we do that? We hear a question, a comment, a statement, and we rush to a huge conclusion about what the speaker is saying or wants. Sometimes, the question gives rise to fear in us, and sometimes to anger. If we can just quiet ourselves and let them talk, we may find they really don’t need anything from us at all. Or what they need might be far simpler than we expect.
Learn to listen and wait to form a response until you understand what you’ve been told. And then, keep it simple.
Oh, and if you have an answer to that S-E-X stuff, let me know. I have a few friends with young children who might be needing some help with that.
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