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From Braless to Aging Gracefully

In the 70's I romped the city braless. Yup, women were standing up for their rights and wearing no bra and saran wrap dresses. Now look at us. With gravity taking its course we throw them over our shoulders and age gracefully. We snicker at the young folk who do not allow nature to run it's course (on the other hand if you're like me you refuse to spend a bunch of money to keep those tummies tight and inserting silicone to keep other places perky) or allow themselves to calm the rebel inside.

Back in the day, I opened my mouth and didn't care how it affected anyone else.

Because I wanted to voice my opinion and that's all that mattered. Back in the day.

Aging gracefully is a pretty cool thing. I'm not FIGHTING my way to 'MAKE' everyone think like me and detach from those that are trying to push views on me. I don't allow anyone to dictate how I feel on any one subject but I certainly don't let anyone run over me either. Sometimes it's hard to think clearly when ones own mind is taking over with ones own thoughts.

Stepping in another persons shoes is the most enlightening experience in my life that I'll have each day.

It allows one to open their mind....get out of self...and see the other side.

There are two sides to everything aren't there?

Throughout all my time on ActiveRain I keep working hard on separating MY feelings (that is definitely a hard task!) and stick to my own healthy boundaries. (MY healthy boundaries. You have to make your own boundaries that suit your own needs because what works for me may not work for you)

Though there are some subjects or people I wholeheartedly do not agree with...I can only voice my concerns or opinions (or not) and move on.

Where did this all come from?

Look all around here ....what are the topics that upset people the most?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MY LEGACY IS ALL ABOUT THE QUALITY OF RELATIONSHIPS I HAVE WITH OTHERS

And..... Without that quality, tell me.....what is a Professional worth?

Posted by Celeste "SALLY" Cheeseman HAWAII Relocations & Real Estate on 09/04/2008 11:44 AM

Comments (71)

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71 Comments on From Braless to Aging Gracefully

SEP

2008

Be free! Do what make you feel good...

We all learn much later in life...if we listened to the old timers and respected them like other countries do, we could save some steps. Good honest humble post!

Sally, You're still lookin' good! I told my daughter that I'd take a year off my age for every year after 50, so now I'm 47. She never lets me forget. When she's 18, I'll be 42. What the heck, she already acts older than me. Be well!

Do you think that Active Rain is the place to voice opinions? I'll admit to a guilty pleasure in reading the more incendiary posts, but I never join in because although I have my opinions (don't we all!), I never quite feel comfortable knowing how quickly I could be judged and dismissed for sharing them with someone who doesn't agree. It's not fear, it's more just a lack of desire to be anything here but your friendly California mortgage broker. What do you think?

Sally- Very nice....liked this a lot. What you didn't say got me more than what you did......our Boundaries is for sure.

Yep - 2 sides to everything! That is what makes this life interesting. By keeping an open mind, it's really true, you can learn something new everyday!

I miss the 70's:-)

Doug: What makes us 'feel' good is not always the right way either is it?

Andrew: We all have to find our way in this world...and one thing is for certain...our beliefs are our own and sometimes we need to change them.

Charlie: Maybe I should have just put the sign.... :) The point here is forcing views and what I do to remove myself from it :)

January: You're so right...judgemental to the max and no ....some subjects are just not touchable for me....stay tuned....

All I can say is, I sure wish I would not have fallen for the no bra pitch! We should tar and feather who ever came up with that one.

This is a funny post -- ha ha , throwing them over your shoulder! ha ha

I am sure the title of your post got some readers. Good points -- aging gracefully isn't easy and I think, unfortunately, aging is less of friend to women than to men.

Kathy: Thanks...I was starting to wonder how much was getting read lol!

Scott: Oh, good....you said it all...read it all :)

Yep - 2 sides to everything! That is what makes this life interesting. By keeping an open mind, it's really true, you can learn something new everyday!

Yes voicing your opinion is good but you can't learn more than what you already know when just voicing your opinon. Other opinions challenge you and by allowing that you can grow. Let's keep the bras on and learn to share and not convert.

Aging is a fact of life. Its not easy or gracefully done. Thanks for the reminder. I too am embracing middle age, because it is better than the alternative!!

;)

Jason: You were a little kid...and most likely something to remember.

I hope I'm around when a lot of the current crop of tattooed women feel the effects of "gravity." There's no such thing as "aging gracefully" with some of the tattoos I've seen lately.

Tolerance of other opinions is a quality that is losing favor in this country, and that's too bad.

Sally Ah yes I remember it well, the time when women were changing the world view and letting it all hang out:) Last night my kids were watching a show and the band played the music from "I am Woman" I started singing and they had no idea what I was singing. It is funny how important that song once seemed and it now is just a dim memory.

As for aging gracefully I say bring it on. I enjoy being me more today than ever before. I do try to limit my opinions to helpful ones and hope that I don't offend anyone. I do learn more everyday. Thanks for the blog.

Sally,

Gone are the days when you could all sit around a checkerboard in a country store and discuss matters civilly!!! A shame!!! Thanks, Fran

Sally,

Thanks for the morning giggles (((((-: oops, i guess it's afternoon! o well.

I don't have much in the boob department and I made the mistake of telling my bf that at one point I considered getting 'enhanced', however I made sure to tell him i was only joking. He teases me constantly about that now...hmmm.

I HATE bras!!!!!! Of course I have to wear one when I go out because my Mother's voice is forever ringing in my ears 'Wear a bra!'. I too used to run around bra-less when I was younger, whenever I could sneak out the door without one. ((-:

As soon as I get home at the end of the day, off comes the bra! Ahhh, freedom. Anyhow, that's probably more info than you really wanted to know. Isn't it fun being a woman?

With regards to the stuff on AR that cause problems...uhhh, politics? I do my best to steer clear of those posts. Does bra-burning fall under politics?

I don't know Sally. The man said, "Nothing happens until somebody sells somebody something." I'm not sure you can get away from opinions, yours or others, unless you just take a weekend off or something.

It's a battle for me to put myself in someone else's shoes, I admit it. I think it's a good idea, but it's one of those things I just don't 'remember to remember'.

Just do what you do...be happy with yourself and don't pay any attention to the other stuff. By the way...Kathy called me last night and we had a nice long conversation.

Doreen: If I had only known...lol! Needless to say...we learn throughout our lives what is tactful ...or NOT. :)

Bob/Carolin: Glad you like the opening part....moreso, opinions we have need not be FORCED on others...but taken into consideration.

Kevin: More to the story than age and bras :)

Ross: We share...we put each other in anothers shoes to maybe look at a different perspective....then if it suits the needs of the individual we learn and grow. Other subjects and topics that are clearly debatable and fighting subjects I do not grow from.....but learn to stay away from.

Betina: So what do you think about voicing...and forcing opinions:?

Richard: Aging gracefully includes my statement about how I had to voice my opinion (many many years ago) and did not care how it affected anyone else....We grow over the years if we start to open our minds and realize that there are other opinions....including my own....that sometimes do not need to be voiced...without ulterior motives. Forcing views is different than just giving an opinion....

Paddy; And that's the key.....not intentionally offending others with judgemental opinions.

Fran: Yup...and gone are the days when we kept our opinions to ourselves when it involved topics too fragile to not end up in arguements. :)

Jo: This was fun....but at least we know where this was leading. :) There are a few topics that need not be discussed....what may be good for one...may not be good for others.... Other topics worth discussing on a public forum like this REAL estate network are to be taken into consideration as well. Hmmm...like what?

Charlie: We ALL have opinions.... we're all human. Having the ability to look at others opinions and decide what to do with it is the whole concept of looking at the bigger picture :)

Hey Neal...oh, I do...I do. Just trying to make light of an age old conversation that turns pretty negative if we let it. :) Kathy is pretty cool to talk to.

Sally, Great post. Can never imagine doing anything surgically to my body to keep it from ageing or enhancing my body to make it fit a society's standard. I have 2 daughter's who look up to me, what kind of a standard would I be setting for them? As for this place there have been many places where I have kept my opinions to myself, not because I am afraid of telling people my opinions, but because there is a time and there is a place for doing things like that, and AR is not that place.

Mana: Ah...the comment of reasoning :) Of course you are! And I too...am the same...a time and place for everything...besides...the rebel in me went out the window with 'change'. :)

Gosh, this post had me thinking in so many directions...remembering my hippie days, thinking how grateful I am to have grown more balanced...age can be a wonderful thing. I don't know what inspired this post but I know you are handling it just right!

Sally - I don't fling mine over my shoulder, but I have been known to tuck them into the waistband of my pants.

As for surgical options, hell, YES, I would. That's on my "to do" list after I get some other things taken care of. I'd like a nice medium size pair of teardrops. I'm sick of my biggies.

As for bras, if you saw my post Things We Do While Driving, you'll remember that I take my bra off while I'm driving home each night. I hate the dang things!

Regarding opinions, any opinion should be fine to share, as long as it is done respectfully and with no ill-will intended. My motto is "if you have to think about it twice, don't do it." Although sometimes my temper gets the better of me.

"Hang" in there,

Dee

I can relate to you so well. Part of growing older should be growing wiser...learning how to filter our words and actions through the "Does this build up or tear down" test. Thank you for sharing so honestly!! GBU!

WooHoo, It's funny but the older I get the more bra I need:) I yam what I yam.

Hi Sally,

The no Bra is a eye catcher. In Hawaii anything goes so I thought lets see what Sally has to say. I like your attitude. In Hawaii there are so many different types of people if you close the door or throw out the baby with the wash you miss out on some interesting people. It is amazing how many people don't think like I do. Religion, politics, race what ever. If you close the door on other peoples opinion you miss out learning something new. So the older I get the more I realize my opinion is not that important even know I can share my ideas. Nice article keep up the good work. By the way you local girls are timeless.

Steve

I just had to comment again, some of these comments are really pretty funny :) Oh yea they got the message most of them, but the unintended message seems to have hit as well.....I loved the one about having to tuck "them" into her pants .....LOL :)......

and to think I gave up reading a good old fashioned lying Politics Article for this LOL :)

Sally, as to your statement, "Look all around here, what are the topics that upset people the most?"

As a six week old Rainer I read at least 25 to 30 blogs every day, sometimes more, and on the three occasions I have found myself very UPSET the blogs were"Political" in nature but came off harsh and defamatory. I wish Political blogs were posted only in the political groups and not on the main page where I run across them by accident.

Sally - interesting that as you get older you're less about saying what you think and more about caring about the feelings of others ... when for so many people passing 50 means that they care less about others and are more open mouthed.

Thank you With that title I had to stop by and read your post. We must be about the same age. I felt like I know you.. great post and enjoy being you! Brenda :)

Sally sounds like we would have been two of a kind back in our younger years :) :)

The only difference is that I still don't need a bra ......... LOL

I definitely miss the 70s. It was a fun time for sure.

Diane: Just thoughts typed out....getting ready :)

Dee: That's cool...at least it's tucked in all nice and neat lol! Your "respectfully" and "no ill will intended" is the core of an open minded person just giving an opinion...nothing more..nothing less.

Elizabeth: Exactly! Thanks for coming by to give your down to earth comments....need more of that right about now :)

If gravity plays with my body anymore I will be walking on all fours - you crack me up - certainly have missed you

At the end of your days, it will be how you lived your life that will be important.

If you followed your beliefs your heart will be full of joy.

Richard

BB: Really? You just yam around buddy. :)

Steve: I crack up...the majority of people don't read the whole thing.....so I figured there would be some hilarious stuff....then the complete message in the comments...cool. You got it... older, wiser, mellower and hey...opinions we have ....learning lessons are great :)

Kathy: Great huh? Needed to lighten up a bit....life is wayyyy to short my friend :)

Linda; Yeah....with as much that is cutting into my tv time I'll stay away from it here as well. We have enough on our plates here with a rail system that's going to cost billions that I will NEVER take my clients on :)

Sharon: yeah....it looks that way doesn't it? How are you? How about a hug right about now?

Thanks Brenda!

George: Wow...you must be in good shape then lol! So...what did you do in your younger years?

Randy: No kidding. Those were the days huh?

That's pretty funny Thesa! I'm glad you're back too!

Richard: That's pretty nice :)

OK, I had to come back to tell this... I know that boobs were not the point of the post, but several years ago a bunch of us were going to lunch. We were trying to fit all in one vehicle and one of the older among us said 'OK, everyone pull your boobs out of your armpits and we should have room for one more in the back seat.' At the time I thought it was a funny comment, then. Now... LOL! Over the shoulder, in the armpit, out of the way. hahaha

SEP

2008

We often recommend our agents not take part in the politics groups or in individual blog posts. Politics can quite often make you lose friends, clients or both as people can feel very strongly about their party affiliations. Sally you're going to be fine, even if someone upsets you on this network, us and many others will come to your rescue :)

Happy posting-

Sally, pretty good way to get us to read this post....all the way through. Cute beginning and great ending! I still can't get over the beautiful garbage truck! Owning who you are and allowing that to emerge is the basis of that relationship building we want to evolve for our work and value proposition. The transparancy of Blogging has proven to be a beautiful way to connect and find our clients....the clients that want to work with us and that we want to work with. You are the best at it! Promoting the real you is the secret!

I love reading all the different blogs and hearing all the different opinions, but I hate it when someone is trying to convert me to their way of thinking. I can think for myself! That's not to say that I won't listen and digest someone else's opinion, who knows, I may change my mind along the way. There are always two sides and if we just open our minds a little we might learn something new. Most of the time, when I don't agree I just move on and refuse to get drawn into the fray, it's just not worth it. Lately there have been many political posts...I stay away...but I do appreciate the passion the writers express even when their opinions may differ from mine.

Oh what a touchy subject, Sally. When I was younger, I felt that whatever came into my head was fair game to come out of my mouth. If I thought it, you'd better believe I said it. Now, since I've gotten older, or since I had kids who model exactly everything I do or say (or maybe a combination of both??), I've been a lot better at protecting other people from my mouth. At least, I try to be better! I admit that I'm not always successful and sometimes I do just let it fly on out. Of course, I did start praying about it. Psalm 141:3 says "Set a guard over my mouth, O LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips." I really needed to do that because my mouth used to be scalding! hahahaha Just ask my poor husband! He'll happily tell ya!

I think the whole point of your post is that just because we can talk about something doesn't mean we should talk about it! And like I've said before - it isn't always what you say but most often the problem arises in how you say what you say.

There are many blogs posted here about the teenage daughter of McCain's running mate (can't remember the girl's name) getting pregnant. Now, talking about the situation is one thing. Some of these posts are down right disturbing! And I have to admit that I did comment on one post and then decided to stay away from all of it. It is just safer that way.

As Carey (January Financial) said: I never quite feel comfortable knowing how quickly I could be judged and dismissed for sharing them with someone who doesn't agree. You just never know who is reading these blogs or the subsequent comments! Do you want to lose out on a potential client because they don't agree with your political or religious views - or just because they don't like the way you presented yours? No, these shouldn't be deciding factors on whether or not someone will work with us, but it plays a large part nonetheless. On some subjects, I think it is just better to keep your opinions to yourself.

As for the bra thing, I am too young to remember the bra-burning but can say this. If I could meet one person from history, it would be the guy who invented the bra. So I could smack him in the back of his head.

~Renae

Sally - Good point, excellent comments. No, your title did not get me. I always read your posts but...Anywa, aging with grace is the only way to go!

Stepping in another persons shoes is the most enlightening experience in my life that I'll have each day. It allows one to open their mind....get out of self...and see the other side.

Sally I just sent you a separate email...not appropriate for commenting here.

Sally let's just say that I was not always this mild tempered. It is amazing what a few years, and a little more experience will do :)

After turning 30 this year it is so nice to see a blog with this topic. I think it is so unfortunate how many of our youth turn to plastic surgery everyday. Nice to know that aging gracefully hasn't totally fallen by the wayside!

Hi Sally,

I am getting remarks email to me. Pretty funny you strck a cord. Keep it coming.

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2008

Hey Sally! I can't believe you were around in the 70's.....me too! I still sort of feel like it was just a few years ago.....what happened?! Were you in Hawaii then? I love this post.....I love anything that brings back those fun memories! I was in Birmingham, and Hello! I'm still here, watching the changes....SO MANY!

Have a wonderful week!

Ann Allen Birmingham Realtor

Doreen: Well, I think it's more than that to make room now....lol!

Castle: Yup...and that's why I sit way high up in that castle :)

Jeanean: You are one that I love to read as well...you are straighforward and give insight from the depth of your soul. :)

Kelly: And so many do not understand that as it's their way or no way.

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2008

C Sally C, awesome... simply awesome. I really enjoyed this post and the conversational thread. Very cool and too funny! :-)

Renae: And that's the whole point! Why would I want to alienate others because of my views? That goes not for the consumer but for friends and family as well. Everyone has an opinion....but to get into knock down drag out arguments because of them is another story.

Gary: Okay... the title did go with my post...no grabbing attention and sitting there wondering how that pertained lol! Thanks for reading....and I'll stick with what I have.... :)

Margaret: You're too funny. Thanks....and catch ya later...:)

George: No kidding. And to think...we were like all these folks ....way back then :)

Allen: Look under all of that....

Steven: I think what people have to look at it being open minded and not stuck in their own thinking...it can get pretty lonely in there :)

Ann: YUP....since 1967. My mom is from Kauai and my dad was in the navy....after traveling we retired here. I was 10.

Carolyn: Gotta make light of this time... :)

Sally ... ohhh the memories of the 70's (I was only a wee child, of course, but I still remember) ... unfortunately, I don't know what it meant to 'let it all hang out' LOL ... I was cursed with the opposite of Jo-Anne (sorry, Jo ... I'll give you mine, any time). :)

Aging gracefully ...hmmmm... not sure how I feel about it, only that at almost 50, I feel like a 29 year old (and will always be 29) :) ... I hope to always feel young at heart, and keep trying harder and harder to keep my opinions to myself, although very hard sometimes. It's difficult sometimes to keep one's mouth shut, but I try harder now - something we don't think about much in our youth.

Sally, wish me luck doing something I've always wanted to do ... visit Hawaii in my 'old age'. :)

Sally, the above comment is mine ... but AR has been kicking me out all day. :/

Sally - You don't look old enough to have even owned a bra in the 70's!!!!! I have to agree though (having graduated from high school in 1966) I went braless through the 70's AND 80's, living in Europe and enjoying it!

When I moved back to the States in 1988 and put on a bra again for the first time in YEARS I had trouble BREATHING in the darn thing!!!! My parents could not understand what the big deal was!!!

Indeed, as we age, we think a little more before we open our mouths!!! As far as injections and additions, I do use a WALGREENS purchased wrinkle cream, but refuse to spend big bucks on creams or ANYTHING on injections!!!! I have been considering letting my hair go natural, but wonder about how it would look for business........

As far as those boobs pointing south, at least we HAVE them! We did not grow up with places like Victoria's Secret selling 'boobs in a box' like they do today! (A funny side story, about 10 years ago, when my daughter was a teenager, we were in Victoria's Secret looking at just such a box. The sales girl came over and wanted to know if she could help us to which my daugher said 'No thanks, I have my own and don't need to buy any'.......wonder where she got that mouth?!?!?) :-)

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2008

Girl - you have aged so beautifully (even in the time I've known you on the Rain) - it's so true - learning how to share and disagree without being disagreeable is almost a lost art in our culture - and never more obvious than during a political season. You were cracking me up with the thought of you "going braless" back in the day - lol. Like fine wine....you're there baby better and better each year.

Sylvie: My husband says we're a good fit because I'm immature lol! I have no problem being assertive...but in a nice manner...usually.

B/B: Hahah...that's funny. ONe thing is for sure....we voice what we do...but not half as bad as when we were younger. :)

Cyndee: Thanks...I sure enjoyed our little visit....it sure makes a difference to meet in person...although usually the ones I've been close to throughout tend to be the same in person anyway. :)

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