A few days ago...while searching for some important papers...I discovered a box of keepsakes that I have not seen in many years. Taking a seat on the side of my bed, I began searching through my ‘treasure box'...not really sure what I would find hidden inside. One at a time, I took out pieces of my past...cherished memories preserved in photographs, cards, children's drawings and letters.
As soon as I saw the little bundle of pink parchment envelopes...my heart skipped a beat, and a single tear rolled down my cheek. In that moment, I was a teenager again...fragile and insecure...wanting so badly to ‘fit' into the world but having no idea how to find my place. I remembered the feeling I experienced every time one of those pink parchment envelopes arrived in the mail...knowing it would be filled with her words of love, encouragement and acceptance. I must have read each one fifty times, but it was never enough. How I wanted to believe that she truly did love me...that I really was ‘a very special girl'.
Betty Burgess Avery was more than my teacher...she was the first person (outside of my family) who told me that I was a person of value...the first person who believed in me. She looked beyond my ‘mask' that I wore to hide my broken heart and saw straight into my soul. She chose to love me and poured her love into my life, despite my fears and doubts that anyone really could love ME. She was my angel...sent from Heaven to rescue me...when I needed her the most.
Then suddenly...she was gone...taken from me by a drunk driver. I never even had a chance to say ‘good-bye'...never had a chance to tell her how much I loved her...never had a chance to thank her for investing so much of herself in me. I only had my angel, Betty Avery, in my life for five months...but God used her to change the course of my entire life.
After reading all of her letters again, I decided to write one last letter to her.
Dear Mrs. Avery,
I found some old letters today...your letters...your love letters to a broken, 13 year-old girl. How did you know how desperately I needed to hear those words...as I never found the courage to tell you how much pain was trapped inside of my heart...how much I hurt. Somehow...you just knew.
Remember those nights when we stayed up all night long talking? I wanted to tell you everything, but I could not find the words. I even wrote you many letters that I never sent. I was afraid that you would not be able to love me if you knew the ‘real' me. I could not risk losing your love, because it was the most important thing in my life.
The day that I learned of your death was one of the darkest days of my life. I did not want to face the world without you behind me, cheering me on. I almost gave up that day...but once again...you rescued me. I kept hearing your words..."You are so special. I see great things in you, Beth. I wish you could see what I see."
In that moment, I made a choice to believe your voice instead of all the other voices that told me that I was worthless...unlovable...unnecessary. I wanted to prove to the world that you were right...that you did not waste the final four months of your life...that your life and your love changed the world (at least my world).
Throughout the past 28 years, your voice has always been with me...still reminding me that I am special...still cheering me on. When life is hard, and I am tempted to give up...I remember that you never gave up on me. In every moment of victory...I pause and remember you...and wish I could celebrate it with you. I know you would be proud of me...
Before I close...I want to tell you one more thing. You gave me so much...but I did not have anything to give you in return. In 1987, I gave you a very special gift...I named my first daughter after you... ‘Avery Elizabeth'. She knows why she was named after you, and she wears your name so beautifully and so proudly. Although she never knew you, she loves you...just as I love you.
Until we meet in Heaven....
Your Beth
Written and Posted by:
Elizabeth Nieves - Broker, REALTOR® -- The Elizabeth Nieves Realty Group @ Keller Williams (A Bilingual Real Estate Team serving Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill NC and surrounding areas.)
Visit our website at http://www.elizabethnieves.com
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