Oh, yes, it’s blooper day, and I found some eye-popping gaffes on the MLS this week! I think I finally figured out why we consistently see such errors – agents are letting their pets write their listing remarks. On the other hand, I suspect that my dog can spell better than some of these culprits, so I may be casting unfair aspersions. Enjoy:
Is There A Pulse?
“House on coroner” (How convenient – he’s already there to pronounce himself dead.)
“No balls after 9 pm” (My ex had the same problem.)
“House will shit all buyers” (That's one helluva fast exit strategy!)
“Sorry – already bought” (Sign on Kim Kardashian's ass.)
"New faceleft" (Oh boo-hoo - my face quit on me at age forty!)
Can You Detect A Heartbeat?
“Stay toned for open house schedule” (Hollywood sure is a tough market!)
“View from top of hell” (Graffiti in the Oval Office john? )
“Big barths” (Bad hangover, huh?)
“Just needs lifts” (…said Tom Cruise’s agent to his producer.)
“Pool chub” (Caption under my photo at the YWCA.)
Pull The Plug
"Allow extra time for new TRIC rules" (Oh, are you selling a brothel?)
"Hurry before the holiday stump" (Are you planning to donate a leg in the office toy drive?)
“Coy fish in big pond” (Where are the seductive fish – in the kegger pond?)
“Big water fault in back” (That’s called a swimming pool, Jethro.)
"Bend over all offers" (Ouch. This is a tough crowd!)
"Mote submissions accepted until Friday" (This gives new meaning to "wet signatures.")
Last Rites
“Bright, Quite garden condo. like home 3bads and 2 full bath, fire place3 tend-om parking, incloding refrigcrater” (Take the fork out of the socket and the antennas off your aluminum foil hat. Your hair is in flames, honey…and your career may be as well.)
That’s it for this week, folks. Remember: Spell well and sell!
Please visit me at www.gwenbanta.com, or visit www.victorylodgeinfo.com to see my magnificent listing: "$16,400,000 Log Cabin Estate" and NEW VIDEO: LAKE ARROWHEAD MANSION - $13,900,000 
Thank you!
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