Welcome to this week’s edition of “Dazed and Confused." I am not sure how any of this hilarious ad copy will help sell the properties being marketed. Nevertheless, these bloopers do provide some giggles, so please enjoy:
Well, of course!
“New bullit house” (Just another day in Bonnie and Clyde’s ’hood…)
“Please request paperwok” (Not unless a fire extinguisher comes with it…)
“Nicest house aground” (Real Estate ad in The Shipwreck Times.)
“High Def TB included” (That explains the X-Ray machine in the driveway.)
“Free-sanding house” (I think Habitat for Humanity already came up with that idea.)
Well off-course
“Drawing for new Druid” (Good,we all need to update our sorcerers.)
“War family gathering spot” (Sign above bar in John Gotti’s basement.)
“Leak phone message” (Questionable advice attributed to Edward Snowden’s ex-psychic.)
“Raid house” (Don't kill the roach, smoke it, dude!)
No Recourse
“Threats for kiddies” (Where is this house - Whoville???)
“Fridge now porking” (I guess that’s how the mini fridge in the den was created.)
“As easy as A-B” (Reason # 1 not to sniff paste while typing.)
“Put your prophet to work for you” (I did. My prophet said my readers should send me money.)
And just plain coarse
“Our lender has constrictions” (Has he considered buying bigger briefs?)
“Now some wringle room” (I’m glad your lender and his "wringle" took my advice…)
That’s it for this week, folks. Remember: Spell well and sell!
LIVE IN LOVE - HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!! 
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