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58 years with the same parents! - 07/31/10 10:41 PM
OK, for us kids it isn't quite 58 years, but that is how long Mom and Dad have been married. Mom and Dad celebrated 58 years with many friends and family around them. It was a very simple get together, but still had the same effect...LOVE! There was silly dress ups along with games for young and old! And what is a back yard party with out food on the grill and a beer or two! What is a back yard party without a game of shoes? This was the last game we threw...I started with a double (10 comments)
Sounds like a great offer...Weekend Humor! - 07/31/10 11:39 AM
A client shard this with me this morning. Said his brother was an atty. Also said that it was very true of him! The devil walked into an atty's. office one day. "I can set you up for life', said the devil. "I can increase your earning 5 fold, make it so that everyone in the office loves you and you can have 4 months of vacation a year. All I need is your wife's soul and your children's soul." The Atty thought for a second..."Sounds good...What's the catch?"
Have a safe weekend everyone!
Seniors with a sense of Humor! - 07/29/10 09:16 AM
As I have shared with you before...I love working with Seniors. They have great stories and are real to the core. I always leave feeling uplifted after an appointment with a senior. The thing is every year I understand this generation even more. I can't seam to REMEMBER why! That said...many have a great sense of humor... My last Doctor's visit: At a recent Dr's. visit, I asked the Dr. how they decided when a person should go into a health care facility. "Well, we fill up a tub with water and have you get in. Then we offer you a (10 comments)
This rule works in my house! - 07/28/10 10:42 PM
WE all have rules in our homes... Keep your feet off the table, at least when you are eating. Leave the toilet seat UP! Don't drink anything right from the carton, unless you are going to drink it all! Take muddy shoes off after you have wiped them on the new rug! When the family dog is done licking it's butt, or what ever else it can reach, it is OK for it to then lick your toddlers face. You get the idea. In my home we also have the 50-50-90 rule. The man will have a 50-50 chance that when (10 comments)
Buying American is to expensive! Is it really? - 07/27/10 09:10 PM
I hear this a lot from people. Then in the next breath they say there are no jobs. They send them all overseas! I not going to get into the obvious banter of...buying American promotes jobs and taxes paid and a number of other things. I am looking just at the products themselves. First off...tools! this is the hardest one for me. Good quality tools cost a lot of money! BUT, many are Made in the USA! You can spend a dollar on a cheap imported 10" crescent wrench or pay $7 for a good well made USA made wrench. For (25 comments)
My wife is having a Garage Sale and I have un-invited myself! Fishing anyone? - 07/26/10 08:55 PM
I hate garage sales. At least the ones that we put on. More work than they are worth and you still end up with stuff you don't want. So, now that she is ready to set up, I am going to help and then go fishing while they make all kinds of money!(Yea Right) So, to get ready, I call Jim, one of the good ol' boys from down the road. He loves to wet a line and his wife is really glad to see him go. "Jim, I am shedding the leg irons Friday. The Bass are calling. You (13 comments)
Even Blind people need to shop! ( Late sunday humor ) - 07/25/10 10:28 PM
My wife loves to go to stores just to look. Me, I have looked and bought and now it is time to use! But, here is one for everyone who enjoys browsing at a store. An elderly gentleman walked into a boutique. With him, a seeing eye dog. Not wanting to stare at him, the clerk acknowledges him and says..."If you need a hand, just give me a yell. The elderly man walked to the middle of the small store, takes his dog and starts to swing him around in a circle on his leash about shoulder high. Startled by this (14 comments)
Did a loan officer give you the price range you can afford? - 07/25/10 09:53 PM
I met a young couple at the home for sale in town. It was our first meeting. I was going to be in that area when I was done with my last showing with a different client. I usually like to meet at the office to do some ground work, but after a few questions, I felt comfortable enough to meet at the house. I told the husband to bring the pre-approval letter with them. He had told me that he talked with the lender already. They were at the home when I arrived. A very nice home, vacant and (9 comments)
OOPS, you got here to soon...(Humor) - 07/24/10 11:02 PM
I could only be this lucky! 2 men died and were standing at the pearly gates. I am sorry guys, but your mansions are not ready yet. Can we send you back down to earth until they are ready and you can be anything you want. "Sure" said the first guy. "I want to be an eagle flying over beautiful scenery." POOF gone in an instant. The second guy said, "Yea, sound great. I'd like to be a cool stud." Poof, off he was. After some time, St. Peter told one of the Angels that it was time to bring the (14 comments)
Owners who finance their sales, are coming out on top! - 07/24/10 10:23 PM
Prices are down and financing is harder than ever. Now look at bare land and that statement is truer than ever. Local banks want from 40-60% down on bare land. There are very few who are able to compile that kind of money. There is a big pool of buyers, many of them who have been foreclosed on, who are looking for land. They want to start compiling something for the future. Many of them had and still have good jobs, but because of prices being down, could not refinance. We have all seen this before. This pool of buyers have (6 comments)
Some things never change! - 07/23/10 10:28 PM
I was out this evening with new buyers. Pre qual. letter and all and out we went. After about 3 houses with 3 to go, the lady said she would like to look at homes that were higher priced. "Well, we can look a little higher, but we are already looking at homes that are listed above your pre-qual. amount already." "I want to look at homes that are 30-40% above what we are qualified for." "Just how do you plan on paying for this extra dollar amount you will need above the loan?" "Well, the sellers will just have (25 comments)
A friend is getting Married...How can I help?! - 07/23/10 08:03 PM
Another good guy will bite the dust this weekend. 42 and never married! The guy had it made. He never had to Mow the grass..just because! He never had to prove he actually went FISHING! He didn't have to worry about leaving the seat up on the toilet. How can I help him see the error in judgment he is about to make. I think I have it!!! A little gift just before the Bachelor party! I am going to send him a 'Mother-in-law" Dressed in flannel PJ's and a Mud pack to boot. That should do it!!!
"X" marks the spot!!!! - 07/20/10 09:21 PM
A bit of light humor for the end of the day. Things seam to be a bit tense so enjoy! Bob and Fred are out in the boat fishing. They are having a great time and the fish are biting non-stop also. "This is the best day of fishing we have ever had", said Bob. "It sure has, to bad we couldn't mark this spot for the next time", replied Fred. Bob reaches into his tackle box and pulls out a big marker and puts a big 'X' on the bottom of the boat. "There, now we will know!" "That is the (9 comments)
I seam to be growing Old...Quickley. - 07/18/10 11:43 PM
I visited this weekend with a good friend. He is getting up in age and the body is giving out. Here is a few words of wisdom to chuckle at... At a 104, a man in the nursing home was asked...."What is the best thing about being 104?"No peer pressure!" A lady at the funeral home was taling to the mortician. "How old was Fred?""He was two years older than me. Hardly worth going home, is it!" "The nice thing about being senile...You can hide your own Easter Eggs." "My memory isn't as sharp as it used to be, and My (9 comments)
The tests come back OK. (Friday Humor) - 07/16/10 02:06 PM
We all get a bit tired and run down at times...but I can't remember blaming it on this!!! A lady had a checkup with her Dr. She was complaining about fatigue and always being tired. None of the tests show anything wrong, so, he asked her "How often to you have intercourse?" "Every monday, wednesday and friday." she replied. "Well," the Dr. said..."Cut out Wednesday." "I can't" she said, "That's the only night I am home with my husband!"
OK...Now I am going fishing! (11 comments)
I Won the Lottery!!! - 07/15/10 11:08 PM
Yup, it's true...I tripled my money! At this rate I can retire in about 2000 years. My winning ticket paid me....3 bucks. But, this guy did much better.... The car comes to a screeching halt in the drive way. Out jumps the ladies husband and in to the house he rushes..."Honey...pack your bags...I Won the Lottery!! "OH MY GOD...What do I pack...beach, mountains Big city?" "It doesn't matter," replied the husband...Just get the Hell Out!!!!" I would be the one leaving with my new boat...going to the lake!!!
A wednesday Funny - 07/14/10 08:04 PM
Relationships seam to be Love Hate...When you love them you still seam to somehow hate them. It is the indiscretions that you get caught in that are the downfall... A lady walks into a drug store and askes the druggist for some arsenic. "Ma'am, what are you going to do with arsenic,' he askes. She replies..."I am going to kill my husband." "Well for that reason, I can not sell you any." the druggist replied. The lady reaches into her purse, pulls out a picture of a man and women in a compromising postion. The Man, is her husband...the woman is (10 comments)
I feel depressed...But I could still be useful! - 07/13/10 02:38 PM
We all go through days where we just aren't at the top of our game. Some days I feel like I didn't even get to the ballpark. I think this short story will relate my feelings... Over 5000 years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel...Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels and i will lead you to the promise land! Nearly 75 years ago, (When welfare was introduced), Roosevelt said...Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses and light up a camel, for this is the promise land! Now, Obama has stolen your shovel, taxed your asses, (9 comments)
An evening with family... - 07/12/10 11:22 PM
Because of busy schedules, I don't get a chance to catch up with my boys. If is isn't me busy, it is one of them. They live close, and we talk often but visits are hard. Tonight, we said that is it...we are getting together. Mini-Golf was the ticket. Now, non of us is real good, but we had a great time. This was our second course of the evening. Located in St. Croix Falls, WI. Yea, I live in Minnesota, but this is the closest [place to go to and it's about a 1/2 hour away. We didn't (12 comments)
Greed will catch up to you someday! - 07/11/10 09:55 PM
How many times have you seen it. Someone gets lucky and finds a windfall, and then tries to increase it. Gamblers are notorious for this. They win a little and then think they are on a roll, next thing they are behind. But they are not the only ones... At a Kansas Kwik Stop gas station, a man goes inside to rob the place. He finds that the till has very little money in it. Not to be deterred, he ties up the clerk, and then works the counter to increase his take. He was arrested after 3 hours when a (14 comments)
Sometimes you just look guilty! - 07/10/10 09:39 PM
As a kid I grew up on the farm. We did a lot of things that were, well, let's say the law wasn't in agreement with us. Nothing that harmed others per say, just timing issues with the local conservation guys usually. A couple of young lads were fishing in one of their favorite spots at an out of the way lake. All of a sudden, from behind the bushes, out jumped the game warden. One of the boys dropped his pole and took off running. Seeing this, the Game Warden was hot on his trail. After about a 1/4 (12 comments)
Tell me again...How were you going to secure a loan? - 07/10/10 07:03 PM
The phone call was for a piece of land that I have listed. "Can I move my older Mobil home on it?" "No I am sorry, but zoning does not allow that in this area." "Ok, but I am still interested in the land." "Who do you have your financing set up with?" I am hoping to do a contract for Deed," was the reply. "I was foreclosed on 2 years ago, so bank financing is a problem. It was a voluntary foreclosure. But, If I find a house, I have my GI Bill." "Do you know what your credit score is"...still (8 comments)
So, You want to buy a fixer upper... - 07/09/10 11:00 PM
My clients told me they were not afraid of work. They said ..."We can paint and clean carpets." In a few days we can have a house ready to move into. OK...What dream land are you living in. Reality check!!! I take them to a Fixer Upper. "Hey, this place is a dump!" I was told. "Yes it is...This is a fixer." "No, this is a remodel job." OK...Here in lies the problem. "Now this is a fixer upper. It requires a large amount of tools and skill. A lot of material to bring the shack up to livable (17 comments)
TGIF!!! - 07/09/10 06:37 PM
WOW, what a fast week. It has been busy and I won't complain. It does mean that my weekend fishing tip will be postpones. But, here's a short story for those of you getting to the lake. Jim had a tough day of fishing. He sat in his boat under the hot sun and didn't catch a single fish. On his way home, he stopped by the supermarket and ordered 3 catfish. He told the guy behind the counter... "Give me 3 of the largest ones, and then throw them to me." "Why do you want me to throw them to (16 comments)
The NEW GM car! - 07/08/10 11:18 PM
I had not seen this before, so I thought many of you had not either. When I opened my E-Mail, I had to laugh and still am chuckling at this. Just another day in the great US of A General Motors, Proudly Announces... THE 2011 Obummer This car runs on Hot air, Bull shit and broken promises. It has 3 wheels that speeds it through tight LEFT turns.It comes complete with 2 teleprompters programmed to help the occupants talktheir way out of any violations.The transparent canopy reveals the plastic smiles still on the faces of the happy owners.It won't (18 comments)
They say Everyone Loves a Parade... - 07/07/10 11:53 PM
Well, many people do anyway. I thought I would share a few of my favorite photo's from the Moose Lake, Minnesota parade from this year. Moose Lake is near our cabin and we go to this great small town parade most every year. First the color guard. Notice the hats off and hands on the heart. It was this way as far as you could see with everyone standing. This community still understands!!!! A community band. A bunch of local folk playing whatever instrument they know how. Were they good? Does it really matter? They were playing for their community!!! This was (7 comments)
Heat and Humidity...It isn't all bad! - 07/07/10 08:22 PM
For much of the Nation the heat and humidity has been nearly unbearable. It is hard on people with respiratory problems and many of the very young and old. But, it isn't all bad news. I have seen families hit the beach together. Yes, young and old at the same beach, not the kids in the water and the parents at the picnic tables. For some families, the heat is a great thing. It has caused them to spend time 'together'. It has also brought friends together for some great fun. These teens were on this raft for almost 2 (10 comments)
Amazingly Simple Home Remedies. - 07/06/10 01:01 PM
After a fun weekend and one that had a scattered amount of business, this morning has been a catchup day. I have made all he calls, now it's hurry up and wait for the return calls. So, I thought being the 1st day after a Holiday takes some motivation to get moving that some light humor would help. Amazingly Simple Home Remedies. 1) If you are choking on an ice cube...simply drink down a cup of real hot water. Presto, the blockage will simply remove itself. 2) Avoid cutting yourself when preparing vegetables...Have someone else hold them while you chop! 3) (12 comments)
The little Rabbit (Humor) - 07/02/10 10:03 PM
Long story, but this hit me funny... A little girl goes into the Pet Shop. She has a small speach problem and asked the owner for a Wittle Wabbit/ " Do you want a white on or a brown one. he asked" "Well, I don't fink my Python really gives a thit."
They can't all have somewhere to go!!! - 07/01/10 06:08 PM
Well, I finally got underway for the weekend. It 's a nice drive and so while I am driving, I thought I would write this blog. OH...Don't worry, I put the car in cruise control! OK OK...I just stopped for coffee and I am waiting for a client. As I have been driving and seeing all the traffic of people starting the weekend early, a thought came to mind. Just where is everyone going. I try to imagine all the places that they could go and the list is endless. A statement that my dad made many years ago. (11 comments)
An early start to the weekend. Let's laugh a bit! - 07/01/10 07:31 AM
I am starting the holiday out early. Partially because I am working off and on all weekend, so I am going to spend my holiday hours a bit more spread out. But, we all need a boost sometimes to get rolling and I believe this will do it! 2 Irish Nuns were immigrating the the United States. Upon their arrival, the first one says... "I hear they eat dogs here." To which the 2nd replies, "That is odd, but, if we are to live in America, we may was well do as they do." While sitting on a bench they (10 comments)
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